Cave Spring is a quaint little town in north GA located about 10 minutes from Rome. With all its charming little businesses, it should be pictured on the front cover of a Southern Living Magazine or at least featured in an upcoming Georgia Public Television episode.
The city was actually named for - you guessed it - a natural spring bubbling out of a mountain cave located in the middle of town. People come from miles and miles around, (no kidding) just to fill up bottles, milk jugs, and any other container you could think of, with this amazingly clear, great-tasting water. On any given day, you can drive into the park and join the line of people already there, filling up their containers. Some are pulling wagons, while others are simply bringing a couple of jugs at a time to the water's edge. Let me warn you, though. If you ever decide you want to visit and collect some water of your own, don't think you'll find a spigot or a hose. The water flows directly out from the mountain, and in order to collect it, you have to bend down and over the water...sort of like Augustus Gloop when he was drinking from the chocolate river in the Wonka Factory. Collecting water from the spring is not a dignified experience, so it would be best to leave your heels and your dress clothes at home.
The water tastes better than any of the bottled stuff you'll ever buy and is as clear and cold as a mountain stream. Best of all, it's free. I think that's the draw for people. It would be for me, if I lived any closer.
Yet, there is another Water, clearer and better than even the Cave Spring water. Jesus Christ, Himself, is that Water...the Water of Life...and like the water in Cave Spring, when people taste It, nothing will ever satisfy quite like It again. Once your taste buds develop an appetite for the Living Water, that long trek in your home from the bed to the "quiet time chair" will seem like just a hop, skip, and jump. Church will no longer seem like a place just to go on Sundays, but instead, you'll drive long distances and not complain about the preacher going over into the lunch hour. You'll find yourself wanting to be with Jesus, over and over again. Life will taste sweeter...because it will be.
Just like the Cave Spring water, receiving the Living Water costs you nothing, except maybe a little dignity. You can't get it from a tap. You can't stand up and expect the Water to jump into your heart. You have to humble yourself and bend your knees to be filled.
Let me encourage you, drink freely. Open your Bible and wait. Sit and listen for Jesus to speak...and then be filled.
Whoever drinks of this water will thirst again, but whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will never thirst. But the water that I shall give him will become in him a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life. (John 4:13-14).
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Saturday, January 15, 2011
The Progression
"It's just not worth it," I thought. The young couple behind me in line were getting increasing agitated with one another. The young man was supposed to have "picked something up" and brought it to the check out line, but didn't, and the young lady wasn't letting him forget it. It was merely a communication problem, but the longer they "conversed," the more intense the conversation became. Surprisingly, they weren't getting louder: their voices were actually getting softer and softer. Finally, there were no voices at all...just silence...accompanied by "the look."
"It's just not worth it," I thought again as I peered around to see if their eyes had softened toward one another..."It's just not worth it."
After 17 years of marriage, I actually HAVE learned a few lessons - some of them, the hard way. I've learned that husbands love and need to be respected by their wives. I've learned that men, just like women, need to feel appreciated and cherished. I've also learned that arguments just aren't worth the havoc they create.
"Be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to become angry; for the anger of man does not bring about the righteousness of God," Scripture says in James 1:19. In Ephesians 4:26, God warns us to "Be angry and sin not." Great Words of Wisdom, but how difficult it is to put them into practice. Sometimes, even the little stuff inflames me. I find myself burning everyone around me and then regretting, repenting, and apologizing. It's a vicious cycle that needs to stop in my life...and yours.
My husband taught on this very thing in church a few months ago, and it revolutionized some people's lives and marriages. He talked about the progression levels of conflict and how just recognizing these levels can help you control and even dispel the feeling of anger growing within you when confronted with a potentially intense situation.
The first rule of thumb is simple - stay on the Issue Level. In other words, keep the main thing, the main thing. When an argument begins, simply continue routing yourself back to the issue at hand. All too often, as emotions get involved, we stair-step the real problem and jump right into attack mode. One minute we're talking about not having toilet paper because our spouse simply forgot to purchase it and the next, we're pointing fingers and saying things like, "Well, YOU never remember to get the things I need."
Do you know what I'm talking about? The "discussion" is no longer about toilet paper. It’s about a person. The conflict has progressed from the Issue Level to the Personal Level. See the difference?
So you can see how it’s imperative to stay focused on the issue. Keep the main thing, the main thing. Never allow yourself to say, "You always..." or "You never..." Stay on topic and don't deviate. This really helps, because it doesn't just keep you in control of your tongue, it helps to diffuse the potential for anger in the other person. If you allow yourself to start pointing fingers - the intensity in the situation increases, instead of decreases, and emotions begin to take control, instead of reason.
HOWEVER, even if this happens - even if a discussion reaches the Personal Level, you can still get back on track. Stop yourself, apologize to the Lord AND your spouse. Control your thoughts AND your tongue. Then, resume the discussion. If you don't, things will get out of hand quickly. The argument will gravitate and elevate to the Relationship Level. This is NOT where you want to be. As the accusations continue, anger increases, and all of the sudden, you're thinking (or even worse, saying) things like, "I can't believe I ever married you in the first place."
A simple act of forgetting the toilet paper has birthed a seed of bitterness that will grow and consume an individual if not kept in check. Do you see the progression through the different levels? Do you see how dangerous NOT staying on issue can be...not being quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to become angry?
Oh my friend, communication that progresses to uncontrolled anger and bitterness is just simply not worth the cost. The next time a potentially strained situation occurs, let’s allow the Spirit to have control - to keep us in check and on the issue. Our marriages, our relationships, our right-standing before Jesus – all of those things are at stake and worth the effort to learn how to communicate and confront in a loving manner. Don’t you think?
Jesus, open our ears and hearts and close our mouths. Help us to love each other as You love us...unconditionally. Help us to communicate well, honoring You in the process. Help us to live lives worthy of Your calling. We praise You, Jesus. Amen.
"It's just not worth it," I thought again as I peered around to see if their eyes had softened toward one another..."It's just not worth it."
After 17 years of marriage, I actually HAVE learned a few lessons - some of them, the hard way. I've learned that husbands love and need to be respected by their wives. I've learned that men, just like women, need to feel appreciated and cherished. I've also learned that arguments just aren't worth the havoc they create.
"Be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to become angry; for the anger of man does not bring about the righteousness of God," Scripture says in James 1:19. In Ephesians 4:26, God warns us to "Be angry and sin not." Great Words of Wisdom, but how difficult it is to put them into practice. Sometimes, even the little stuff inflames me. I find myself burning everyone around me and then regretting, repenting, and apologizing. It's a vicious cycle that needs to stop in my life...and yours.
My husband taught on this very thing in church a few months ago, and it revolutionized some people's lives and marriages. He talked about the progression levels of conflict and how just recognizing these levels can help you control and even dispel the feeling of anger growing within you when confronted with a potentially intense situation.
The first rule of thumb is simple - stay on the Issue Level. In other words, keep the main thing, the main thing. When an argument begins, simply continue routing yourself back to the issue at hand. All too often, as emotions get involved, we stair-step the real problem and jump right into attack mode. One minute we're talking about not having toilet paper because our spouse simply forgot to purchase it and the next, we're pointing fingers and saying things like, "Well, YOU never remember to get the things I need."
Do you know what I'm talking about? The "discussion" is no longer about toilet paper. It’s about a person. The conflict has progressed from the Issue Level to the Personal Level. See the difference?
So you can see how it’s imperative to stay focused on the issue. Keep the main thing, the main thing. Never allow yourself to say, "You always..." or "You never..." Stay on topic and don't deviate. This really helps, because it doesn't just keep you in control of your tongue, it helps to diffuse the potential for anger in the other person. If you allow yourself to start pointing fingers - the intensity in the situation increases, instead of decreases, and emotions begin to take control, instead of reason.
HOWEVER, even if this happens - even if a discussion reaches the Personal Level, you can still get back on track. Stop yourself, apologize to the Lord AND your spouse. Control your thoughts AND your tongue. Then, resume the discussion. If you don't, things will get out of hand quickly. The argument will gravitate and elevate to the Relationship Level. This is NOT where you want to be. As the accusations continue, anger increases, and all of the sudden, you're thinking (or even worse, saying) things like, "I can't believe I ever married you in the first place."
A simple act of forgetting the toilet paper has birthed a seed of bitterness that will grow and consume an individual if not kept in check. Do you see the progression through the different levels? Do you see how dangerous NOT staying on issue can be...not being quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to become angry?
Oh my friend, communication that progresses to uncontrolled anger and bitterness is just simply not worth the cost. The next time a potentially strained situation occurs, let’s allow the Spirit to have control - to keep us in check and on the issue. Our marriages, our relationships, our right-standing before Jesus – all of those things are at stake and worth the effort to learn how to communicate and confront in a loving manner. Don’t you think?
Jesus, open our ears and hearts and close our mouths. Help us to love each other as You love us...unconditionally. Help us to communicate well, honoring You in the process. Help us to live lives worthy of Your calling. We praise You, Jesus. Amen.
Saturday, January 8, 2011
My "To Do" List
I'm a list person. Give me a pen and a sheet of paper, and adrenaline starts pumping through my veins. It thrills me to imagine all the things I can jot down and cross off, all at the same time. You've probably met people like me before...people who make lists and add things they've already done, just to feel the accomplishment of having "done" something. Yep, that's me.
But there's a method to my madness. "To Do Lists" (when I "do" them) seem to help me accomplish more things with my time, organize my thoughts better, and not forget what I'm supposed to be getting done! However, I've noticed that if I'm not careful, this "list mentality" can be detrimental, especially to my relationship with Jesus.
For instance, after the kids went to bed tonight, I started thinking about all the things that we could do as a family tomorrow...paint the house, unpack the suitcases that have been sitting in the floor since last Saturday, vacuum, etc.... Sounds like good quality, family-fun, right?!? Anyway, my thoughts progressed: "I'll start with my quiet time, fix breakfast and get to the laundry. Maybe while the kids are folding clothes I can..." All of the sudden, I realized that in my list-oriented little brain, I had LUMPED Jesus in with everything else. I wasn't thinking about building my relationship with Him. I was thinking about getting my time with Him, DONE. Ouch.
Now, in no way am I suggesting that I don't need to "schedule" time for Jesus in my life. Scripture tells us specifically to set aside time to spend with Him. However, when that "time" becomes simply another "to do" item to check off, I need to re-evaluate...and repent!
My quiet time with Jesus should never be about "getting something done." My quiet time with Him should be about building a relationship...sharing life with One I love...having Him order my day, so that all that needs to be done, will get done!
Thank You, Father, that I'm not merely on Your "to do" list...that I'm precious to You...that You cherish our relationship. Thank You that You passionately desire to spend time with me...to build a deeper and more intimate relationship with me. I'm amazed by You...amazed.
Zephaniah 3:17 - The Lord your God in your midst, the Mighty One, will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with his love, He will rejoice over you with singing.
But there's a method to my madness. "To Do Lists" (when I "do" them) seem to help me accomplish more things with my time, organize my thoughts better, and not forget what I'm supposed to be getting done! However, I've noticed that if I'm not careful, this "list mentality" can be detrimental, especially to my relationship with Jesus.
For instance, after the kids went to bed tonight, I started thinking about all the things that we could do as a family tomorrow...paint the house, unpack the suitcases that have been sitting in the floor since last Saturday, vacuum, etc.... Sounds like good quality, family-fun, right?!? Anyway, my thoughts progressed: "I'll start with my quiet time, fix breakfast and get to the laundry. Maybe while the kids are folding clothes I can..." All of the sudden, I realized that in my list-oriented little brain, I had LUMPED Jesus in with everything else. I wasn't thinking about building my relationship with Him. I was thinking about getting my time with Him, DONE. Ouch.
Now, in no way am I suggesting that I don't need to "schedule" time for Jesus in my life. Scripture tells us specifically to set aside time to spend with Him. However, when that "time" becomes simply another "to do" item to check off, I need to re-evaluate...and repent!
My quiet time with Jesus should never be about "getting something done." My quiet time with Him should be about building a relationship...sharing life with One I love...having Him order my day, so that all that needs to be done, will get done!
Thank You, Father, that I'm not merely on Your "to do" list...that I'm precious to You...that You cherish our relationship. Thank You that You passionately desire to spend time with me...to build a deeper and more intimate relationship with me. I'm amazed by You...amazed.
Zephaniah 3:17 - The Lord your God in your midst, the Mighty One, will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with his love, He will rejoice over you with singing.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Don't Lose Heart!
Happy New Year!!! I know…I’m only the 900th person to tell you that, I’m sure. We spent our New Year’s Eve in a hotel room, huddled in two beds, watching both the “ball” and the “peach” drop! It was the first time that all the kids had stayed awake past midnight, so it was a pretty neat experience.
Speaking of the New Year…I have one wish for you. Actually, it’s not a wish at all. It’s a promise. A long time ago, I memorized a verse of Scripture that the Lord has whispered into my heart over and over again. I don’t recall why I memorized it, but it sure has been a huge blessing to me - Galatians 6:9 – And let us not lose heart in doing good, for in good time we shall reap if we do not grow weary.
Now that’s something to rejoice over in the year to come. God tells us that if we don’t lose heart…if we don’t give up, we will reap a benefit. Something good will come from our perseverance.
Now, sometimes when I am having a hard day with my kids or with my own self (am I the only one who gets on my own nerves?), God encourages me with this verse. He reminds me, “Belinda, don’t give up. Don’t quit doing good, no matter what. Don’t let anyone or anything distract you from what you are supposed to be doing because I have something so great planned in this. No, you can’t see it right now, but oh how I can’t wait for you to see it soon. You will reap, Belinda. This ordeal will pass and as you struggle through it, doing just exactly what you are supposed to be doing, you will see it. You will see the reason…the purpose…you will reap, Belinda. Just don’t give up.”
So as the New Year begins, may I comfort you with the same words with which I have been comforted. Don’t lose heart in doing good on your job, when it seems no one is noticing. Don’t lose heart in doing good while raising your kids, when you don’t see results. Don’t lose heart in doing good to those who hate you and would love to see you fall. Don’t lose heart in doing good…period. For if you don't lose heart, Scripture promises that you WILL reap something good from sowing something good. Things may not turn around instantly for you. It may take a while, but the promise of God is still there. Let God handle the outcome…you just continue “doing good.”
Thank You, Father for never giving up on me…for never growing tired or weary in doing good for me and to me…for never losing heart. May I mirror that aspect of Your image, even today.
Be blessed in 2011, my brother and sister and may you never-ever-never-ever lose heart in doing good.
They that wait upon the Lord will renew their strength. They will mount up with wings as eagles. They will run and not GROW WEARY. They will walk and not faint. (Is. 40:31)
Speaking of the New Year…I have one wish for you. Actually, it’s not a wish at all. It’s a promise. A long time ago, I memorized a verse of Scripture that the Lord has whispered into my heart over and over again. I don’t recall why I memorized it, but it sure has been a huge blessing to me - Galatians 6:9 – And let us not lose heart in doing good, for in good time we shall reap if we do not grow weary.
Now that’s something to rejoice over in the year to come. God tells us that if we don’t lose heart…if we don’t give up, we will reap a benefit. Something good will come from our perseverance.
Now, sometimes when I am having a hard day with my kids or with my own self (am I the only one who gets on my own nerves?), God encourages me with this verse. He reminds me, “Belinda, don’t give up. Don’t quit doing good, no matter what. Don’t let anyone or anything distract you from what you are supposed to be doing because I have something so great planned in this. No, you can’t see it right now, but oh how I can’t wait for you to see it soon. You will reap, Belinda. This ordeal will pass and as you struggle through it, doing just exactly what you are supposed to be doing, you will see it. You will see the reason…the purpose…you will reap, Belinda. Just don’t give up.”
So as the New Year begins, may I comfort you with the same words with which I have been comforted. Don’t lose heart in doing good on your job, when it seems no one is noticing. Don’t lose heart in doing good while raising your kids, when you don’t see results. Don’t lose heart in doing good to those who hate you and would love to see you fall. Don’t lose heart in doing good…period. For if you don't lose heart, Scripture promises that you WILL reap something good from sowing something good. Things may not turn around instantly for you. It may take a while, but the promise of God is still there. Let God handle the outcome…you just continue “doing good.”
Thank You, Father for never giving up on me…for never growing tired or weary in doing good for me and to me…for never losing heart. May I mirror that aspect of Your image, even today.
Be blessed in 2011, my brother and sister and may you never-ever-never-ever lose heart in doing good.
They that wait upon the Lord will renew their strength. They will mount up with wings as eagles. They will run and not GROW WEARY. They will walk and not faint. (Is. 40:31)
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